Many couples are experiencing dissatisfaction in marriage. Such that the real marital bliss is eroded by challenges not envisaged at the beginning. Therefore, discontent can emerge at any stage in marriage. Not necessarily at the early stage. Surprisingly, some of the problems emanate from within. The causes are traceable to either of the parties. At any rate, issues generated within are better handled internally. Under normal circumstances, such a situation does not require the involvement of a third party. Unless they carelessly allowed the situation to degenerate. How to handle marital dissatisfaction becomes relevant in efforts, to re-establish comfort and guard against future re-occurrence.
The worst situation arises when the source of the problem is somewhat difficult to trace. Particularly, where none of the parties is willing to open up. It simply means that the cause of the issue is private, and confined between the couple. For this reason, things will go wrong for a while, until they resolve. consequently, marital hatred will set in, which regrettably results in an acute threat to the relationship. Such marriage is characterised as an unhealthy relationship.
In extreme cases, couples will be so displeased by the situation. And consequently have the feeling of checking out of marital life. Sometimes, it leads straight to divorce.
Causes of marital dissatisfaction
Practically, causes of marital dissatisfaction can majorly be grouped into three as discussed below:
Internal cause of dissatisfaction in marriage
In marriage, certain discontents are created by the couple. Some of which are unconsciously generated. Sadly, every one of these problems has effects on their relationship. Good enough, a whole lot of all these marital complications could be efficiently resolved without a third party. Now, let’s discourse about internal causes of dissatisfaction in marriage, in turn.
- Internal factors are traceable to couples and children in most cases. Their occurrence is either through commission or omission. In either of the cases, it is an established fact that they are responsible for the situation.
- Change in the Lifestyle – A sudden change in the lifestyle of any of the parties often has an impact on the relationship. The adopted style may affect the spouse badly. The issue of way of life is, of course, personal, but not so in marriage. Usually, lifestyle change has a direct influence on the spouse. And the effect can sometimes result in dissatisfaction among the entire family.
- Regular disappointment – Displeasure occurs in marriage when hope is dashed and expectations are not met. Persistently failed promises usually result in outright displeasure. So it is in marital life. It is unpleasant to make promises that are not redeemed, within a reasonable time frame. However, there could be genuine reasons responsible for the failure.
- Persistence domestic violence – Unfortunately domestic violence often arises in a marriage. Marriage that is full of assault and other manner of domestic violence usually constitutes dissatisfaction.
- Living separately for too long – Living separately is not the issue, but it can be frustrating, particularly, if it’s getting too long. More discouraging if there are no regular calls. Usually, a couple in this situation suffers the intimacy or closeness required to strengthen a relationship. Women in particular often experience great dissatisfaction under this condition. Regrettably, some separations are traceable to living separately in marriage.
- The incident of infidelity – A sad experience occurs in all cases of unfaithfulness. All action capable of jeopardizing trust has a direct impact on the mental status of the affected party. Fundamentally, a great deal of dissatisfaction in love is the order of the day, in every home, where trust is damaged.
- Financial problem – The scarcity of funds in a family can result in terrible hardship.
External cause of dissatisfaction in marriage
- External factors refer to those influences emanating from the immediate surrounding of a given marriage. The custodians of such forces are, usually, known to either of the couple or both in some instances.
- Peer influence – The feeling of being accepted or valued by friends can influence marriage. However, this can sometimes have a negative impact if it is a bad one. And the spouse in this case can be affected, thereby resulting in dissatisfaction.
- Influence of in-laws – In some notable cases, discomforts are the handwork of in-laws. Findings show that mothers-in-law are a paramount influence in most marriages. This happens, in most cases, because of beliefs and traditions.
- Effect of intruders – To a certain degree, marital intruders end up causing discord and displeasure between lovers.
- Malicious rumour – If the rumour is not immediately debugged, it commonly wreaks havoc on an existing relationship. And the effect can somewhat be difficult to address.
- Influence of the siblings – Selfish siblings carelessly unleash unnecessary hardships and discord between husband and wife.
Natural cause of dissatisfaction in marriage
Natural force basically refers to challenges that are beyond human control. Therefore, in a marital setting certain things naturally happen and cause discomfort. Obviously, you cannot avoid nature calls. But then, be positive.
Fixing dissatisfaction in marriage
It is, generally, offensive to experience dissatisfaction in love. However, once the cause of displeasure is established the next line of action is to engage a corrective measure. Irrespective of the stage at which dissatisfaction occurs, it is important to know whether it is internal or otherwise. This gives you the impetus on how to handle marital dissatisfaction.
Internal factors require the coming together of husband and wife to address issues appropriately. This is because reasons or causes are traceable to the couple or children as the case may be. The corrective measure is more of an internal affair and peculiar to individual marriage. And as such, determining the best time to resolve marital issues for reconciliation is essential.
Put all concerned issues on the table for discussion. Maintain the quality of sincerity of purpose in your effort to proffer solutions. Be factual in disclosing the area you are not satisfied with. Never hesitate to tender an apology when necessary. At the same time, forgiveness is a marital tool for reconciliation. Thereafter, adjust your way in the interest of love and peace. Respect in marriage is key in any relationship.
External factors – Bad friends can be avoided and intruders can be, effectively, handled when discovered. It is not out of place to respect in-laws and choose to treat them accordingly. At any rate, rumours and gossip can be proactively discouraged.
Natural force – Obviously, you cannot avoid nature’s calls. But then, be positive in all human endevour. Avoid any act capable of causing self regrets or feeling guilty in the end. Therefore, it is important to know how to handle marital dissatisfaction.
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Natural
Evil forces
2 comments
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