Time is of essence
In an effort to correct wrongs or misdeeds in a marital setting, time is of the essence. Unnecessary delay usually makes simple issues to become more difficult to resolve. Further delay is often responsible for leakages of marital information to the hearing of neighbours. So it is not encouraging to allow marital misunderstanding to tarry in any way. However, where there is a good reason for a delay — efforts should be intensified not to prolong it. Notwithstanding, under normal circumstances to resolve marital issues without a third party is the ultimate, and intruders are kept away
Make a nice sacrifice
Taking a bold and tactical step in the direction of reconciliation is the responsibility of either of the parties. Certainly, it takes two to tangle. But the fact remains that two wrongs cannot make a right. Usually, there is always a peacemaker, a more cool-headed couple. He/she will want to maintain peace, love, and progress in his/her matrimonial home. He does not want to welcome any third party. Well, if you do not want to engage the involvement of a third party. Then make a nice sacrifice by inviting your partner. Invite your spouse for a more intimate discussion, basically, on the issue at hand. Of course, the emphasis is on how to resolve marital issues without a third party.
Communication
Many a time things go wrong without having knowledge of the root cause. So it is, in a marital setting where one of the parties refuses to speak out. Unless you make your grievances known to your spouse, he/she remains in the dark. So communication plays a massive role in marriage. Cultivating the habit of critical discussion between couples matters.
Avoid unguided statement
In the course of settlement, avoid hash words or actions that can trigger anger. Study your partner’s mood and gestures while discoursing. This gives you an idea of how to navigate your discussion. Try to be more conscious in your selection of words. And be straight to the point. Do not make too much reference to things of the past, unless it will add value to your efforts. Be careful in your connection to similar occurrences in the past. Avoid undue blame, and prepare to take responsibility.
Above all, understanding your spouse’s character is pertinent in order to prevent unnecessary disagreement. By the time you fraternize with your spouse dos and don’t, misunderstandings will be minimized.
Restore happiness and love
Because you want to restore happiness and love. The onus is now on you to absorb and ignore hash words. Ignore all manner of actions that can provoke you. Be patient and listen to him until he discloses everything that made him change his character towards you. Thereafter, be calm and reply with minimum emphasis on your observations with regard to the issue at hand. Now he is cool and more open to reconciliation. At this stage……………………………….and at the end of the discussion ………..sorry about that………………..embrace your spouse. The language, I am sorry, is significant in efforts to settle the marital dispute. The sincere remorse exhibited to show regret goes a long way to douse annoyance. The apologetic language, at any rate, should be timely.
To this end, if the concept works. It simply encourages us to resolve marital issues without a third party. Of course, it is much more honourable. With this principle, you have an opportunity of knowing your spouse better.
My name is Muyideen Elemoro. I am a Nigerian from Ibeju -Lekki Local government in Lagos State. I reside in Abuja, Nigeria.
I am a retired Civil Servant. Presently, I am a marketer and Blogger.
Essentially I write on marital and other related issues. I engage, as a part-time, in Marriage seminar and other related issues.
13 comments
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