Love becomes stronger and permanently rooted in marriage when affection is eloquently established in spirit. And this explains why real love is often regarded as a blind spirit. It takes shape in the innermost part of someone toward her lover. As a matter of fact, real love perhaps goes beyond physical. A lover doesn’t care about what people perceive or say concerning the person he/she cares for. Because he is blind to their observations and feelings. In establishing permanent love in marriage, certain attributes are required to record success without a third party.
Concept of establishing permanent love
The concept of establishing permanent love in marriage centres on happiness, peace, and progress. So, to bring about happiness depends on whose love is stronger between the parties. Generally, the love between a couple is never equal. And as such the party whose love is stronger is the custodian of love. He/She stands to condone the shortcomings or excesses of his/her lover. Such a person nurtures and protects the spousal relationship that subsists in the family.
Conventionally it is not by magic, but with much interest and intensity. In the process, you are likely to face forces that will react to change. The first step is to study your spouse’s character and understand his/her nature. Thereafter, a careful finding will be made on the likely causes of the supposed problem(s). Then you take a calculated step in that direction. Your ability to navigate in this direction with the intent to change your partner’s bad character to a more appreciative one counts.
Attributes required for the successful establishment of permanent love
Practically, certain qualities are ultimately required in the possession of a partner who wishes to establish a long-lasting marital relationship. You don’t expect it out of the blue, it has to be fabricated. So to get it done, you need to equip yourself with the following attributes:
- A sharp focus: You need to remain focused, emphasising your intent. Ignore whatever distraction, in terms of reaction to change. Learn how to manage situations without violence.
- Adequate wisdom: A great deal of wisdom is required to operate without you rocking a boat. You must exhibit a bit of skill to fault existing ideas and introduce more lovely ones. Except with wisdom, it is pretty difficult to achieve this.
- Discipline: Much discipline is necessary to strategies and take action as appropriate. When you are noted for your discipline, you will attract respect and honour. And soon your spouse will cherish your suggestions, and key into your ideas.
- Patience: Except with patience, changing an established way of life is not easy. You need to follow up with patience among other things. The result can be wonderful when the focus is married with patience and humility. You rarely can miss a target when you allow patience to dominate effort in this regard.
- Delight: Be pleasant in your approach to issues. You must be more aesthetical in your presentation to engage your partner’s sentiment. Avoid undue arguments with your spouse.
- Maturity: Exhibit some level of maturity in your marital dealing. This gives you a clearer view of the whole situation. As such you will soon be on top of the matter. The ball is in your court, show skill. This way, you will earn spousal respect and trust.
Attributes mix
A good combination of the above attributes leads straight to success. Particularly in our endeavour to establish permanent love in marriage. Though, each does not function in isolation. For instance, if one is not disciplined enough, the chance of bright success is slim. In other words, if you are destitute of the required patience, then you need to acquire it. Surprisingly wisdom has no substitute.
Possibility of reaction to changes in the process
Despite the qualities highlighted above, some challenges can still emanate for applying the concept. This is where patience and wisdom come to play. The reaction can come from your spouse at the initial stage.
“In the course of counselling, I was opportune to find out that a man reacted to his wife’s move in this direction. According to him, the woman was forcing him to do something against his tradition. It is against their culture to have a bath together with one’s wife. He kept stressing it. I wouldn’t do that! He blunted it again and again”.
In a situation like this, notwithstanding her efforts in establishing permanent love in marriage, three things are expected of the woman:
- First – Relax the trend by changing the discussion or action for the time being. And work towards another time.
- Second – Re-strategies and find a better way of applying the idea. You have to be disciplined and apply wisdom. Take note of your presentation and language/words that trigger your spouse’s annoyance.
- Third – Let him see the benefits of the idea to the existing spousal relationship. Your earlier study of his style would provide you with an insight into his feeling and reaction to issues. Remember he is not a robot. You need a lot of effort to convince him to act against his wish. But slow and steady wins the race.
My name is Muyideen Elemoro. I am a Nigerian from Ibeju -Lekki Local government in Lagos State. I reside in Abuja, Nigeria.
I am a retired Civil Servant. Presently, I am a marketer and Blogger.
Essentially I write on marital and other related issues. I engage, as a part-time, in Marriage seminar and other related issues.
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