To a greater extent in marriage, sex remains a fundamental means and activity skilful for settling marital conflicts. It takes an agreement for both parties to engage in sex under normal circumstances. As a matter of fact, in a marital setting, business taking place behind closed doors is exclusively for lovers. And the interest is practically common to both. Unfortunately, it is not possible where the consent of one runs against the other party. Genuine reconciliation is feasible, once one agrees to be engaged by the other. Sex is all about privacy, it’s not for an intruder or enemy. In any capacity, sex – a means for settling marital disputes is organically effective with a long-lasting effect. Sex is about intimacy, it strengthens spousal relationships.
Identify marital crisis
Once unnecessary space is created between husband and wife, a crisis is sure in a relationship. It reflects that love is tampered with. And many things will begin to go wrong. The affected or aggrieved party is filled with excuses and complaints. The usual business behind closed doors is unduly affected. For sure, one of the parties suffers more, depending on the nature of the problem. But the fact remains that something is wrong. However, differences in this regard require proactiveness. Sex denial is sometimes responsible for flirting in some marriages.
In the process, the aggrieved party may decide to reflect in his/her character that he/she is not happy. For instance, certain rights and privileges may be denied. And because it is about lovers, the pains involved can be very sharp. All to express dissatisfaction. For example, I have witnessed a situation where a man decided to set aside the food prepared by his wife. His reason was that he wanted her to know that he was not happy with her. Again, there are circumstances where wives, in particular, bluntly deny their spouses the right to sex. Of course, this can be very painful. In marriage, people use various means to claim rights. Unfortunately, it can lead to hatred. Sex denial is one of the four major causes of devastating hatred in marriage.
A gap between husband and wife
In any case, when husband and wife fall apart, the centre will not hold. Everyone keeps to his/herself. Unless an appropriate step is taken, this may last for some time. Regrettably, both may be ignorant of the next line of action. However, taking the wrong step can worsen the situation. It can widen the gap the more. And the worst is that the marital train could go off course.
Many times, the application of some methods of reconciliation may not be effective. In marriage, any issue that brings about a gap between husband and wife can lead to a permanent separation. So, to settle such issues goes beyond a mere presentation of a gift. “Efficient medication for some skin problems often goes beyond external treatment.” Some diseases germinate from the inside. You will agree with me that a good relationship will not suddenly turn sour without reason.
Consequently, an unnecessary crack in the marital wall can easily snowball into divorce. It is expected that couples should be proactive in mending any unwanted crisis in their marriage before it gets worse.
Appropriate steps for sex- a means for settling marital disputes
Provided it is established that something is wrong, the solution is not far again. All it requires, now, is to take the appropriate steps as highlighted below:
- Secure your spouse’s attention at the right place and time.
- Ensure it is a place where time and chance permit exclusive privacy.
- Initiate a discussion with a major emphasis on the subject
- Be patient
- Offer necessary apology if you notice you at fault
- Finally, carefully move closer to your spouse and initiate sex for settling marital differences.
Efficacy of sex in settling marital differences
At any capacity, marital reconciliation via sex remains the most efficient. This is so because one cannot secure his/her spouse’s love in the face of dispute. Hence sex – a means for settling marital disputes is highly efficacious among other methods. Using sex to resolve discords gives rise to a new dawn, where one sees the need to cherish her spouse the more. When good arrangement is made for reconciliation through sex, the result is usually superb.
Importantly, the method does not in any way encourage the involvement of a third party. A bold step is required to be taken by one of the parties. In the end, issues are resolved and the conclusion is logical. “For instance, at a wedding ceremony in my locality, It is a renowned practice to offer a word of advice to the new couple. An old widow in her words made it clear that what befit lovers is to resolve marital issues behind a closed door. She explained that her late husband often use this method. In the process, he used to call me by my local name and remind me of how we started our love”. With soft and romantic hands he drew me closer and the bitterness of the past is forgotten.
Above all, never delay or footdrag to say I am sorry when it becomes necessary. In all sincerity, the language – I am sorry goes a long way in marital reconciliation. It has a direct impact on the aggrieved party.