It is a matter of choice for husband and wife to sleep separately, especially on different beds. Of course, it doesn’t constitute a crime, neither does it bring about divorce. Both are at liberty to adopt any style that pleases them. However, it does not foster a married relationship that is expected of a couple. Sleeping in the same bed is the best unless it is a tradition to sleep separately. It simply reflects the agreement to remain as one and indivisible entity. Living in unity, and with actions that justify a good relationship is more beneficial. Therefore doing things in a manner that connotes detachment isn’t advisable. The effects of a couple sleeping in separate beds often threaten the primary intent of an indivisible entity.
On a good note, marriage becomes interesting and pleasant when couples are seen to be firmly united. They operate with one mind. This happens because of the intimacy that exists between them. Importantly, when you sleep with your spouse on the same bed you are, no doubt, promoting togetherness. As such, you would have the chance to study, understand, and tolerate each other. Mistakes made under this kind of arrangement can be easily tackled. Interestingly, marital misunderstandings should not be allowed to tarry for too long.
Some excuses why husband and wife sleep in separate beds
A few reasons are usually put forward to defend the practice of sleeping in separate beds. People with this view, notwithstanding, have the right to their opinions. Of course, some of the reasons are tenable, particularly when they bother health and beliefs. However, some of the reasons for promoting this idea are discussed below:
- Some people choose to sleep separately to prevent uncontrolled sex. It occurs when one of the parties can’t control his/her urge for sex, especially when they share a bed with the opposite sex.
- It happens if one of the parties is not healthy and he/she requires some freedom from sexual activity. In most cases, such advice is on medical grounds.
- Based on belief, some people avoid sleeping with women, except for sexual activity.
- For spiritual reasons, some men at a certain level or class don’t share a bed with their spouse. This particular concept is based on spiritual.
Disadvantages of couples sleeping in separate beds
Notwithstanding the defence in favour of sleeping separately, there are several disadvantages associated with the practice. At any rate, it is important to identify the downsides of sleeping in separate beds. Some of which would not in, anyway, foster genuine married relationships. Usually, in relationships, the coming together of minds and bodies is fundamental. On the contrary, any other arrangement is based on the understanding between the two parties. And may not be healthy for the relationship.
It widens the chance of hatred
The likelihood of hatred is high when normal bed-sharing is denied. The quality of oneness in marriage is practically depicted through bed-sharing. Becoming an indivisible entity in marriage is a powerful bond. You cannot hate yourself. And because you both share a bed the closeness is strengthened. However, once you agree to sleep separately, you have created a gap. Such a situation can make resolving marital conflict difficult. But on the contrary, sleeping in the same bed encourages a romantic relationship
Resolving marital differences can be difficult
Resolving marital differences can be difficult when you consider sleeping in different beds. Ordinarily, issues between husband and wife are often settled while in bed. It is possible only if they are bedmates. However, this is not practical if they choose to sleep separately. Sleeping separately is like creating a temporary separation. Resolving marital issues without a third party is possible when the intimacy is high.
Reduction of a unity bond
Usually, if a couple do things separately they are endangering the bond of unity between them. It is expected that you will encourage actions that would promote spousal relationships. As such sleeping on separate beds can hardly fortify unity. Being united into an entity involves a whole lot of sacrifices. This is one reason all efforts should be intensified and geared towards consolidating your marriage through love, maturity and understanding. In any situation, therefore, ensure that nothing affects the bond of unity.
The level of intimacy is reduced
The feeling of belonging together is primary to the existence of marriage. So, a high level of intimacy should be upheld in love to create confidence. Sleeping separately may reduce the degree of affection required between a couple. Therefore, intimacy reduction is one of the effects of a couple sleeping in separate beds. Confidentiality and trust are usually affected once the spirit of intimacy is denied.
It can result in sex denial
Sex denial is possible when a couple creates an unnecessary gap between themselves. Unfortunately, the idea negates the essence of togetherness in marriage. Normal sex activity is more facilitated when husband and wife sleep in the same bed. And this will cancel the possibility of sex denial in marriage. At the same time, handling sex denial in marriage is easier when both parties dwell in the same bed.