Evil hand of a rapist

The evil hand of a rapist is an indelible print in the mind of its victim(s). An undesirable action against an innocent person. Of course, it is a punishable offence at the instance of the government. But then the damage caused is an irreparable loss. Can the perpetrator receive genuine forgiveness from his victim?

Who is a Rapist?

A rapist is a person who forces someone to have sex with him. In other words, it is the crime of having sexual intercourse with the opposite sex against her will. The underlying fact is that the action is about force. It shows that someone is simply being cheated or ripped off her right. For he has succeeded in taking advantage of her natural weakness. A typical rapist will not desist until he is finally caught in the act. Then he will be punished accordingly.

Some schools of thought believe that there is a spirit behind the act. In an effort to explain this fact. They concluded that a rapist can rape a girl below the age of a month. That is a baby below a year. Which is extremely abnormal. Rapists in this category don’t usually have an explanation for doing it. However, in whatever capacity a rapist is a rapist.

What is more worrisome is where the act is perpetrated by a known person. Not only that he has committed sin or crime. Substantially such a person has betrayed a trust.

Rape as a challenge

But that is not the end of life. The ball is still in your court. You remain yourself until you agree otherwise. Anyone who falls prey should see it as a challenge of life. What befalls another person may be worst and more devastating than this. I have a story of a young man who was involved in an accident. Unfortunately, he had a terrible fracture in his left foot. He became sad and his cry disturbed the entire Emergency unit. He did not stop crying until when they brought another accident patient. This time a patient lost his right leg completely. Then our friend stopped crying when he noticed something much more disastrous. So my dear, in any situation we find ourselves our ability to maintain our stand counts. We cannot keep on celebrating the activities of the wicked ones.

Ignore the social stigma

Yes, the stigma. What about that? It’s just an imaginary mark associated with a particular circumstance. Though it can be so disgraceful. But in this circumstance, it’s not your fault. Because of this, you are as good as an innocent baby. See yourself as such and free your mind from the riddle. Face real life with all enthusiasm. Remember that no condition is permanent. Sometimes a more resourceful lover can suffer jilt. But later when he is discovered by another lady/guy, he/she may be more treasured and treated with full respect. Ignore the stigma and remain focused. I have seen a battered woman being pushed out for no good reason. But the husband’s explanation revealed that the woman was becoming fat. To the woman, it was as if heaven will fall. Approximately 9 months later a National football coach was earnestly running after her.

At any rate, a typical victim needs support to overcome the stigma

Marital rapping

It usually happens in a situation where one forces his spouse to have sexual intercourse against her wish. There should be a mutual understanding under normal circumstances. The law frown at anything that appears like rape. Ideally, there should not be a crisis in that region. As it is meant for lovers in wedlock. At any rate, it is extremely wrong for one to arm-strong his spouse because of sex. Particularly against her wish.

Marital rapping is difficult to analyse in most cases. It depends on the circumstances under which the incident happens. For instance, marital rape may occur when you force your spouse to bed in any of the following circumstances:

(a) If she denies you sex on account of cheating on her ( Having another lover ) (b) When there is an existing rift (c) When she is unhappy in love (d) When using unguarded words against her(as an individual) (e) When she is not sound, health-wise. (f) When her mind is unsettled (g) Unknown reason(very personal) (h) When trust is betrayed

Extreme situation

There are some situations where it requires a slight struggle between the two parties. Some spouses usually enjoy it rough. They need an element of muscle from the opposite sex to turn them on. More preferably, some want it in a gentle manner. All these are usual approaches in a marital setting. Note that none of these approaches would be effective at the instance of a – f above. So it is wise to put marital affairs in a brilliant arrangement. Because some reasons are so personal to her, a man needs to be open to all issues. By this, issues are tackled promptly.

Guarding against the rape

In guarding against rapping, consideration must be given to the category of victims. This will determine the kind of protection. Majorly there are three categories of people that could fall prey:

Categories of rape victims

The under-age girls – People in this category are legally too young to involve in sexual activity, which means that they don’t have an idea of sex. Apparently, they are innocent of the concept.

Mature ladies – They are relatively advanced physically, mentally and emotionally. A stage of adulthood where one can maturely take decisions and be in control of her sexual feeling.

Old women – Elderly women in their more advanced age are mostly referred to as old women. At this stage of life, they probably do not have much interest in sex again.

Suggestions on how to guard against raping

Under-age girls

Children in this category are under the directive and protection of their parents. So it is more of their duty to watch and guide their children. Mothers, for instance, should have an interest in what their girls wear, and their movement at every point in time. Unless when they are in school. In that case, the school authority knows how to do their job. Be mindful of their needs, condition and location at all times. Through psyching; you can know their state of mind. In case someone is trying to play around with them or take advantage of their youthful age. Avoid leaving children to stay for too long with unknown visitors. Guard against girls sleeping in the midst of boys who are of age. Avoid going to a lonely place or walking alone in an unfamiliar area.

Mature Ladies

A mature person should be more conscious in terms of security. And you cannot trust everyone you come across. In the neighbourhood, working place, social gathering etc. Avoid staying alone in some places that are prone to unscrupulous elements. Avoid staying around or close to where notorious rapists reside. Never walk alone in a lonely or deserted area. Shun anyone who has been indicted of rapping. Desist from walking in late hours. Be cautious about men who unnecessarily admire you.

Old women

Old people are not to be left alone. Efforts should be intensified to ensure that someone stays with them at all times. More importantly one should be mindful of the kind of people employed to help our aged parents. They should be encouraged to report any unknown visitors. Beware of unexpected activities around them.